Cupid Strikes Again! Fall in Love With These 50 Hilarious Valentine's Day Jokes (2024)

Some people consider it the most romantic day of the year. Others roll their eyes and claim it's only a commercialized "Hallmark holiday." But either way, most people would agree that "funny" isn't exactly the first word they would use to describe February 14. However, we're here to pleasantly surprise you with these 50 hilarious Valentine's Day jokes!

Is Cupid shooting arrows or goofing around in jest? You have to admit there's already quite a bit of humor involved with imagining someone slyly flying all around with talent not only for archery but matchmaking! And although this holiday is traditionally known more for its sentimentality than wit and wisecracks, we've still got plenty of chuckle-inducing one-liners and puns, along with groan-worthy dad jokes and laughs in store—perfect to share with your Galentine squad and loved ones alike!

So, grab a box of chocolates to snack on, write out your Valentine messages (or Valentine's Day Instagram captions!), line up a classic rom-com (or two) to view, and get ready to giggle in the name of super-cheesy, love-themed quips. After all, roses may be red, violets may be blue, but one thing's for sure—we've got the all-time greatest Valentine's jokes for you!

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50 Valentine's Day Jokes

Cupid Strikes Again! Fall in Love With These 50 Hilarious Valentine's Day Jokes (1)

1. Who always has a date on Valentine's Day? A calendar.

2. What Valentine's message can you find in a honeycomb? "Bee mine."

3. Which new Taylor Swift tune is the best couple's song for two ghosts to share? "Invisible String."

4. How did the coin propose to his girlfriend? He gave her a jingle.

5. What did one Hershey's bar say to the other who arrived long past their date time? "You're choco-late."

6. Why are artichokes so beloved? They're known for their hearts.

7. What did the love-obsessed candle say when it was lit? "I found the perfect match!"

8. What do you call a colorful heart that loves books? "Well-red."

9. How did the orca ask the other to be their Valentine? "Whale you be mine?"

Related: Why My Husband and I Do a 'Relationship Inventory' Every Valentine's Day

Cupid Strikes Again! Fall in Love With These 50 Hilarious Valentine's Day Jokes (2)

10. Why did the magnet hit on the refrigerator? He found her to be very attractive.

11. What's the best recipe for a perfect morning on February 14? A hug and a quiche.

12. What did one piece of toast say to the other? "You're my butter half!"

13. Why didn't the two dogs make serious Valentine's Day plans? It was just puppy love.

14. Why did the dad approve of his daughter's goalie-boyfriend? He was a real keeper.

15. When do bed bugs fall in love? In the spring.

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16. How did one Bloody Mary share their strong feelings with another? "Olive you."

17. What do you call two sparrows who just got engaged? "Lovebirds."

18. Why were the forks disappointed on Valentine's Day? All they wanted to do was spoon.

19. What is it called when your aunt went off to get married on V-Day? Antelope.

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20. What's the most romantic ship? Courtship.

21. What did the pickle say to the other on Valentine's Day? "You're a big dill to me."

22. How did the cashew share its feelings with the almond? "I'm nuts about you."

23. How did the two prunes confirm dinner plans? They said it was a date.

24. What did one cantaloupe write to the other in their Valentine's card? "You're one in a melon!"

25. How did the tennis ball flirt with the racquet? By saying, "Hit me up!"

Related: 100 Unique Valentine's Day Gifts

26. What did one cappuccino say to their shy crush? "Espresso yourself."

27. Why did the skeleton break up with her boyfriend before Valentine's Day? Her heart wasn't in it.

28. What message is on candy hearts for cats? "You're purr-fect!"

29. Why do air fresheners love Valentine's Day? They're so scent-imental.

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30. Where did the high-heel take its date? To the football.

31. How did one drum tell the other about its feelings? "My heart beats for you."

32. How did the vegetable politely ask for a date? "Peas be my Valentine."

33. How can you save money on Valentine's gifts? Become single.

34. What's a cutesy love term that can also be orange and delicious? "Crush."

35. What kind of flowers shouldn't you gift your girlfriend? Cauliflowers.

Related: 61 Valentine's Day Gifts For Your Daughter

36. What did the stamp say to the envelope on Valentine's Day? "I'm stuck on you."

37. Why did all the other fruit ask the banana to be their Valentine? She was very a-peel-ing.

38. What are insects called when they're dating? Lovebugs.

39. What did the baker say to his wife on V-Day? "Gimme some sugar!"

Cupid Strikes Again! Fall in Love With These 50 Hilarious Valentine's Day Jokes (6)

40. What do you call someone with a cold on Valentine's Day? "Lovesick."

41. Why couldn't the mineral water ever get a Valentine? All of his friendships were so pla-tonic.

42. How do sheep share their feelings with each other? By saying, "I love ewe."

43. What do you call a happy couple who first met via Twitter? "Tweethearts."

44. Why was the canoe considered a heartthrob? He was so row-mantic.

45. What did the romantic sing after she got a paper cut? "I keep bleeding, keep, keep bleeding love!"

Related: 125 Romantic Love Quotes

46. Why would Forrest Gump be a good Valentine? He'd probably gift a box of chocolates.

47. Which type of flower is the best at giving smooches? Tulips.

48. What can get you in trouble with the law on Valentine's Day? Stealing too many hearts.

49. What do pieces of fruit write to each other in their V-Day cards? "I love you berry much!"

50. What did the couple say after they were struck by Cupid's arrow? "Ouch!"

Check out:

Cupid Strikes Again! Fall in Love With These 50 Hilarious Valentine's Day Jokes (2024)


What are some good Valentine's questions? ›

10 Power Questions to Ask a Loved One on Valentine's Day
  • Hearts, Flowers… ...
  • What are your dreams? ...
  • What would you say has been the happiest day of your life? (and Why did you choose that day?) ...
  • Can you tell me about your plans? ...
  • What do you think about… ...
  • What do you wish you could spend more time on each week?

What do you call a romance that starts at the aquarium? ›

What do you call a romance that starts at the aquarium? gh. Guppy love. RELATED: Funny Valentine's Day Quotes About Love and Relationships.

Should you ask a girl to be your Valentine? ›

If you like a girl, asking her to be your valentine is a great way to let her know how you feel. There are lots of creative and fun ways to ask her, or you can just be direct.

Who invented Valentine's Day? ›

In the late 5th century, Pope Gelasius I outlawed Lupercalia. Some contend that he designated the celebration of St. Valentine's Day on February 14 to replace the pagan holiday.

What are 4 facts about Valentine's Day? ›

  • A Roman fertility festival was the holiday's precursor. ...
  • There was more than one St. ...
  • Valentine's Day wasn't romantic until the Middle Ages. ...
  • The earliest known valentine has a sad love story behind it. ...
  • Wearing your heart on your sleeve might have been a real thing. ...
  • Cupid was a Greek god.
Feb 14, 2024

What is romance between girls called? ›

The word womance is a portmanteau of the words woman and romance. The emergence of the terms bromance and womance has been seen as reflecting increased relationship-seeking as a modern behavior.

What is a fated mate's romance? ›

FATED MATES - Two characters who are destined to be together. This is most common in paranormal romance. FOSSILS - Extraneous plot details that do not move the romance between main characters forward.

What is a fish lover called? ›

ichthyophile (plural ichthyophiles) A person who is interested in fish.

When should a guy ask you to be his girlfriend? ›

It usually takes at least 2 months of casual dating for couples to make things official, but every pair is different! It's more about the amount of time you spend together—so if he's making every effort to see you, “the talk” isn't far behind. This will be the case even if challenges come up or you live further apart.

Is it a bad idea to ask someone out on Valentines Day? ›

Valentine's Day is actually the perfect time for a first date. Dating experts explain why, and how to not make it weird. Valentine's Day isn't just for established couples. The day can set the scene for a fun first date, a therapist says.

Can a girl ask her bf to be her valentine? ›

Although it's not a requirement, asking someone to be your valentine, whether you're in a relationship or not, is a great idea. It would truly make someone's day and is just a little something extra to show just how much you care.

What is the cutest way to ask someone to be your valentine? ›

Walk up to her, smile, tell her you think she's really cute and will she be your Valentine? Don't do this in front of her friends, nor in front of your friends. Take her aside (“Can I talk to you for a second?”) and ask her privately. Good luck!

What are some Valentine icebreaker questions? ›

Icebreaker questions for Valentine's Day

If you were a Valentine's card, what would you say? If you were a box of chocolates, which chocolate would you be? What is your go-to night in rom-com? What is your favorite flower?

What are some fun Valentine's icebreaker questions? ›

Valentine's Day Icebreaker Questions
  • What is your favorite Valentine's Day candy?
  • Who was your first celebrity crush?
  • What is your favorite love song?
  • Who is your least favorite character from a romantic movie?
  • What dessert would you want to have on a Valentine's Day date?
Jan 4, 2024

What are 5 facts about Valentine's Day? ›

Valentine's Day Facts
  • Origins to a Bloody Pagan Festival. History of Valentine's Day. ...
  • Letters Addressed to 'Juliet' ...
  • Box of Chocolates. ...
  • First Valentine: Written From a Prison? ...
  • 'Vinegar Valentines' Discouraged Suitors. ...
  • 'Wearing Your Heart on Your Sleeve' ...
  • 'Sweethearts' Candies Started Out as Lozenges. ...
  • Cupid Began as a Greek God.
Oct 27, 2009


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